Welcome to the roleplaying journal of Justin Pendleton, a socially inept charming intellectual and murderer from the movie Murder By Numbers.  If you have anything at all to say about my portrayal of him, go ahead and leave a message.  I think I've enabled anonymous commenting?  

I should note that Justin has been in the game and developing for over a year.  He's very different than he was when he first arrived, but I do hope he's still very much in character.  If you have questions about how he went from point A to point B, do ask and I'll do what I can to explain (and if I can't explain, I'll apologize profusely and try to fix it).  You're also more than welcome to hit me up for plotting here!

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Police Case Records

The curses have been relatively benign.  I assume something horrible will happen before the end of the month to make up for that.

I have a question for those of you who have been investigating the workings of the City: Does anyone age here?  The dead don't, but do the living?  That anyone would age in the City seems counterintuitive given the fact that the living return to their home worlds at the moment when they left, but time seems to pass here.  Flowers grow, bloom, and wither; the seasons change.  Are those illusions, or are we immune to the effects of time in a foreign dimension?  Some amount of cell regeneration occurs here.  Wounds heal.  But what does it mean when the living and the dead can both heal?

I didn't spend my entire birthday wondering about the City and metaphysics, but I would like to know if I'm seventeen, nineteen, or twenty-five.

Thank you, Shilo.  For the surprise.


[Police Force Filter // Unhackable]

Is anyone keeping track of new recruits?  Have we made progress in any investigations?  How effective is communication within the force?  It's not my place to ask, perhaps, but our general lack of organization, coordination, and communication is a cause for concern.


[To Angela and Chase // Not Filtered]

I've been told that both of you are now part of the forensics department.  As the head of forensics, I should have met with you both sooner to determine what you'll be doing.  If possible, would you both send me a note indicating the amount of experience you have in the field, your specific areas of expertise, and your contact information?

Thank you.

[ooc: As you can see, my computer is back and I'm ready to annoy you all again. ^_^  Police peeps--if I missed out on anything that Justin should know about, would you mind filling me in?  Thank you kindly!]

[The device switches on in Road's free hand, blurry at first when she moves it around, but soon enough the rest of her can be seen, her other arm half around Justin, pinning his arm to his side. Someone only found out about the curse mid-glomp.]

 I didn't think you liked playing with me this~ much, Justin. [She snickers, apparently more amused than annoyed for now.]

I don't. [Justin, unlike Road, is all annoyance. His mood doesn't improve with the device on.] Turn that off.

[Justin's not-so-trapped arm makes a grab for the device.  The feed ends abruptly.]


[ooc: Road is attached to Justin.  One of them is very unhappy with this arrangement.]

Thank you to whoever was responsible for the explosion by the deities' office.  The damage may have been superficial, but it was an encouraging way to begin the new year.

2010--the end of the first decade of the new millennium.  Ten years after the anticipated end of the world in 2000, nearly three years before the apocalypse supposedly predicted by the Mayans and Nostradamus.  I don't believe in prophecy and those who predict the end of the world have, thus far, been wrong.  Who predicted the City's end?  I've heard rumors--that the clock is winding down, that the City will eventually be destroyed, that all other universes will be destroyed along with it.  How many of us believe these rumors?

Look at history.  Not at the City's history, but at the history of your world.  How many times was the world supposed to end?  How many times did it fail to do so?  The City isn't like most worlds in many respects, but in this...

I doubt the clock counts down to the end of worlds.  If it's anything, this City is a psychological experiment.  After spending over a year here, that is the only conclusion I can reach.

I'm glad to be a part of it.  I hope I'll have the opportunity to say the same in the year 2011.

( Private // Off Network )

[The video comes on to show... an out of focus black blob. The blob moves forward, apparently disinterested in the network device. A Christmas miracle--it's Justin's missing cat, Neith! She looks none the worse for the wear, if a little miffed with the green and red collar scrunchie around her neck.

Anyone who is passingly familiar with Justin will be surprised by the Christmas tree in his living room that the video device reveals. It's a small tree, but it's decorated and more festive than any tree in Justin's apartment ought to be. A tall, tidy stack of Christmas movies sits closer to the camera; the apartment's owner is wrapping a box with the utmost care and precision. Judging by the look on his face, Christmas is Very Serious Business. No merriment here.

Neith returns to bat at the network device, succeeding in sending it clattering to the floor. This gets Justin's attention. He promptly retrieves the device and, after a pause, switches video to text.]

It's Christmas. Nothing terrible is happening.

There's a first time for everything.

At this time one year ago, I was getting as drunk as humanly possible. I'd just found Neith... and an orchid. That was after I stopped living with Richard and after my first time out of the City since coming here. It wasn't a Christmas worth remembering.

This year is better.

Merry Christmas, or whatever you celebrate.


[ooc: As much as I dislike making accidental video posts, no one in the City would have witnessed Justin's attempts at Christmas (except for Shilo) without one. GIFTS: Neil, Todd and Road (yeah, Road) will find an envelope with one indigo in it under their doors (Neil and Todd do get separate gifts, even if they're about the same person). The envelopes are unmarked except for their names.  Uta will find a very brief note thanking her for the watch (very brief--"Thank you for the watch.  - Justin") along with an indigo.  Shilo is special; she will find a plain paper bag hanging on her door; in it is a meticulously wrapped box.  Like the envelopes, it's not marked with anything other than her name.  Should she choose to open it, she will find herself in possession of two insect pins and a plush hippo.

He doesn't like the rest of you well enough for presents.  ...He doesn't like Road that much, either, but that's different.  Merry Christmas?]

( Private to Shilo // Unhackable )

Some things are too good to be believed; others are too good to be missed.

I wish I knew which this situation fell under.


Addendum [voice]

If the barrier is falling and it can be escaped, this will be my final network entry. If this is a trick, I assume I'll return shortly and--and anyone who stayed behind can mock me for taking an illogical risk. Yes, this opportunity to escape seems too good to be anything but a trap. There is, however, a chance that it's not, and I don't know if it's a chance worth losing.

Certain opportunities are worth taking idiotic risks for.

[There's a long pause. What would be silence is full of audible movement; someone's in a hurry.]

I let my cat, Neith, out of the apartment... no one needs to worry about her. If the City is being destroyed, she's sensible enough to escape it. If the City doesn't come to an end and I, for some reason, fail to return, I would appreciate it if someone would care for or redistribute my houseplants. The more exotic flowers won't last long, but the rest should thrive...

Neil and Todd--if you're staying, I have several books you might be interested in. They're on the largest shelf in the living room. Building three, apartment fourteen.

Road... [This pause is accompanied by silence and cut short by a frustrated sigh.] ...I should have something final to say to you. Something scathing and biting... so I can feel like I've won against you. I don't have anything like that. I'm sure you're happy about that.

[Another, more thoughtful, pause. Justin speaks with a certain amount of finality.]

I always thought I would leave the world with a profound comment that would be quoted for centuries to come. ...I guess I'm going to have to disappoint myself. Again.


[ooc: Brb, making a run for it with Shilo. Assume the edited part was added after he and Shilo left for the barrier. Any comments made after the addition will be from ~The Great Beyond~ or... wherever.]

I've seen a number of mentions of justice on the network recently. It hasn't been a popular topic of discussion before now. And why? Is it important only in the wake of highly visible murders? ...In the apparent failure of the City's police force to uphold justice? Or did the boxes that gave us a measure of control over our fate and the fates of others encourage this line of thinking?

This is not a just city. I doubt it has ever been just, and I doubt any law-enforcing unit can make it so.

In calling the City unjust, I have assumed that justice has a universal meaning and can be achieved. Hasty assumptions. I don't think we would agree on a single definition of justice, and we would be hard-pressed to give an example of what true justice looks like. The hypothetical city of Plato's Republic achieves a justice only by committing itself to small injustices--to lies, to inequality, to a lack of individual freedom. If the City were like that, there would be as much discontent as there is now.

What is justice to you? Is it a series of lies that ultimately benefit the community? Is it a leveling force that promises equality to all? Is it security at all costs? A trade between equals, as Nietzsche says? Individual freedom? The domination of good over evil? How do you propose we promote a just society in a city of dictators? How do we uphold any form of justice when the justice-keepers are as subject to curses, sudden disappearances, and random happenstance as anyone else?

Do we resort to vigilantism and assume that those who seek justice for us will uphold the same moral codes as we do? Do we break into a dozen--a hundred, a thousand--groups, each group pursuing its own form of justice? Do we remain idle while accusing those groups we feel should be protecting us of being corrupt or defunct?

These questions are not rhetorical. I'm curious.


[ooc: The comments to this entry (and the general lack of order in the City) are ruffling someone's feathers. Justin's also surly about being a cute and cuddly kitten due to curses, so... have some useless philosophical irritation.]

It feels as if the City's repeating itself. Curses, murder--an endless cycle. It's tiresome.

The latest rash of murders apparently concluded this evening. Information regarding the whereabouts of First Lieutenant Rip van Winkle or the names of others involved in the murders and Millennium as it currently exists in the City would be appreciated.


( Forensic Reports // Left Public )

( Police Filter // Unhackable )

( Private // Unhackable )

Masks of anonymity on and off the network?  A propitious start to the month.

I've been here for one year to the day.  It seems as if it's been much longer.


( Police Force Filter // Unhackable )

( Forensic Report // Off Network // Available to All Police Force Members )

( [Private to Road // Unhackable] )

( [Private // Off Network] )

I've never seen this curse last multiple days. Does it have something to do with the traditional Samhain festivals? Those covered two days--the days that marked the changing of the year. From October 31st to November 1st, the world was believed to shift from a light time of year to a darker and, during that shift, the boundaries between the world of spirits and the world of humans was thought to dissolve.

Fitting enough.

There're some--I've met some people more than once on days like this. Are any of you here?

( Murders // Open to All )

( Police Force // Unhackable )

[ooc: Fourth Wall - Anything goes!  Fourth-wallers can see all parts of this entry and anyone can say anything they please to Justin.  (I should note that I'm up insanely late and will probably pass out now.  I'll be largely unavailable through Sunday, but I'll reply to all tags as soon as possible. :3  Thank you for being patient, and backdating is forever!]

In the interest of clearing up any lingering confusion: I do not play the guitar.  I don't sing.  Ever. 

The curses have been relatively benign in the past week.  I assume this means we can expect the worst on Halloween. 

Shilo?  Would you like to go to the pumpkin patch?  With me.  We can get a couple to carve--a couple pumpkins.  If you would still like to.  It's fine if you would rather not. 

( Private // Off Network )

Today's curse apparently involves werewolves. I recommend staying inside.

Yesterday might have been one of the last decent days to walk through the gardens. The summer plants are dormant now and the autumn blooms are opening. (This holds true for much of the garden, but certain areas appear to be immune to seasonal changes. There was a healthy Ochna serrulata blooming near the graveyard.) Most of my house plants are dormant, but the Tricyrtis formosana--also called the blue Tricyrtis, the Dark Beauty, or the Toad Lily--opened its first buds.

I like plants. They're predictable, quiet, and not prone to cannibalism or murder.

To my knowledge, the latest murders remain unsolved. I doubt anyone will reply, but If you have information regarding any recent criminal activities, you are encouraged to come forward. Thank you.

( Private to Shilo // Unhackable )

( [Off Network] )

In situations like this, I believe maintaining a list of crimes committed is an impossible, unfeasible, and ultimately futile task.  If the City is attempting to further undermine what citizen-imposed order exists here, it's succeeding.  Nothing encourages disorder like a no-holds-barred bout of cannibalism.

The Aztecs were likely cannibals.  They didn't eat people indiscriminately (as seems to be the case today); instead, they performed complicated rituals that involved the sacrifice and consumption of politically important prisoners of war.  In some cultures, eating the dead was a vital funereal rite.  They believed that the deceased would live on--in part--in the souls and bodies of those who partook of their flesh.  Even until recently, women in a specific tribe in New Guinea ate the brains of their relatives out of respect.  There was the Donner Party, as well...

There are more reprehensible cases of cannibalism--cases where the act had nothing to do with respect, ritual, or survival.  Jeffrey Dahmer murdered and consumed parts of seventeen men over a period of thirteen years.

Midnight will be unpleasant.  I assume more than a handful of those cursed won't react well to today's actions.

No one--including me--will be entering or exiting my apartment today.  I'm sorry for missing work, Abby.


[ooc: Cursed, but he's still in his right mind and keeping the gnawing to himself.  I can't believe I have relevant icons.]

( Police Filter; Unhackable )

Now that I have the freedom to create a network entry without a curse influencing me, I have nothing to say.  I read once that the captive always has more to say than the free man.  I don't doubt the veracity of this.

If anyone has information regarding an organization or group known as Weiß or Weiss, please share it.  Your confidentially is assured.


[ooc: Anyone who is close to Justin may have noticed that he has been slightly more reclusive and distant than usual (I didn't know it was possible, either).  Additonally, semi-hiatus is still in effect, so I apologize for slow tags!  This entry needed to be made.]

I'm a murderer.  The murder was unjustifiable.  Deplorable.  Meaningless.  I did it to find meaning, and I did it because Richard wouldn't.  I had to be better than him at something.  I believed idiotic things.  I thought that crime was the truest expression of freedom--murder, the most liberating act.

Richard died because of me.  He was a bastard, but he was all I had and he died because I thought I could redeem myself.  Redemption is a lie.  No one gets a second chance at life.

I joined the police force as penance. 

I didn't regret being in prison--not at home and not here.  I deserved it.  I think I've paid enough now.

I think I love someone, if love is real and not a biochemical response to set stimuli.  She should do better, but I don't want her to.

I should delete this.  Truth is as rewarding as charity.

[The recording device clicks on of its own accord, as these things so frequently do. There's a good deal of background noise--distant screams and sobbing, for the most part--before Justin begins talking to absolutely no one. His voice is hoarse and strangled.]

We already paid for what we did. We already paid. What more do you want? Do you want me to die again?! Will that--it won't fix anything. It won't. It won't bring her back.

When I--I had no idea. You have to believe me. I never thought I'd--I had to show him.

I could have let her die, but I didn't. I saved her, and she--she didn't save me, and she killed him. We paid. I just want another chance... to start over. I haven't hurt anyone else. I wouldn't... I'm not like that. I'm not.

...What was her name?

What was her name...


[ooc: In the prison, obviously. He's been here for almost a year without letting the murdering thing get out, so it was time, yeah? ...Erm. He will be rather surprised that everyone in the City could hear that.]

In light of this, information regarding Weiß or Weiss--whether it's an organization or an individual--would be appreciated. The crime appears to be an isolated incident; regardless, take caution when outside and travel in groups when possible.

Thank you.

( Private to Shilo // Unhackable )

( Private to Self // Unhackable )